TWO YEAR DEGREE COURSE
A new two-year degree is being offered at the University that many of you should be interested in:
Becoming a Real Man. That’s right, in just six mini-semesters, you, too, can be a real man as well as earn an MA degree. (Male Arts)

Please take a moment to look over the program outline.

FIRST YEAR
Autumn Schedule:
MEN 101: Combating Stupidity
MEN 102: You, Too, Can Do Housework
MEN 103: PMS-Learn To Keep Your Mouth Shut
MEN 104: We Do Not Want Sleazy Under things for Christmas

Winter Schedule:
MEN 110: Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111: Understanding the Female Response to Getting in at 4am
MEN 112: Parenting: It Doesn’t End with Conception
EAT 100: Get a Life, Learn to Cook
EAT 101: Get a Life, Learn to Cook II
ECON 001A: What’s Hers is Hers

Spring Schedule:
MEN 120: How NOT to Act like an arse when you’re Wrong
MEN 121: Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122: YOU, The Weaker Sex
MEN 123: Reasons to Give Flowers
ECON 001C: What Was Yours is Hers

SECOND YEAR
Autumn Schedule:
SEX 101: You CAN Fall Asleep without It
SEX 102: Morning Dilemma: If It’s Awake, Take a Shower
SEX 103: How to Stay Awake After Sex
MEN 201: How To Put the Toilet Seat Down

(Elective)
(See Electives Below)
Winter Schedule:
MEN 210: The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
MEN 211: How to Not Act Younger than Your Children
MEN 212: You, Too, Can be a Designated Driver
MEN 213: Honest, You Don’t Look Like Brad Pitt
MEN 230A: Her Birthdays and Anniversaries are Important



Spring Schedule:
MEN 220: Omitting %&*!@ from Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail Only)
MEN 221: Fluffing the Blanket after Farting Is NOT Necessary
MEN 222: Real Men Ask For Directions
MEN 223: Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay
MEN 230B: Her Birthdays and Anniversaries are Important II

Course Electives:
EAT 102: Cooking with Tofu
EAT 103: Utilization of Eating Utensils
EAT 103: Burping and Belching Discreetly
MEN 231: Mothers-In-Law
MEN 232: Appear to Be Listening
MEN 233: Just Say “Yes, Dear”
ECON 001C: Cheaper to Keep Her

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Just a thought for all the women out there.
MENtal Illness
MENstrual cramps
MENtal breakdown
MENopause
GUYnocologist (poetic spelling)

Ever notice how all of women’s problems start with men? And when we have real trouble, it’s a HISterectomy

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Bijou Bazaar
http://bijoubazaar22.googlepages.com

Good one PP

Here's another lesson men should learn. from an email which one of my friends forwarded to me....

Meeting her needs......


One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, but she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear: "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She then responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night we talked for a few minutes and then I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off from work to spend time with my wife. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them all.

She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit.

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you, she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop though when I said, "That's fine, honey."

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT???!!!"

I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me so I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not getting any tonight either....

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I have only 2 cents to contribute, not a cent more, not a cent less ;-)

That was a good one too my2cents!

Hey,

IT'S FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!

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Bijou Bazaar
http://bijoubazaar22.googlepages.com

Quote:

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Originally posted by my2cents

Apparently I'm not getting any tonight either....

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