A Smart gujarati boy
"I'll give $20 to the child who can tell me who was the most respected man, whom people consider God, who ever lived."
An Irish boy put his hand up and said, " It was St. Patrick ."
The teacher said, "Sorry Alan, that's not correct."
Then a Scottish boy put his hand up and said, " It was St. Andrew ."
The teacher replied, "I'm sorry, Hamish, that's not right either.
Finally, a Gujarati boy raised his hand and said, " It was Jesus Christ ."
The teacher said, "That's absolutely right, Jayant, come up here and I'll give you the $20."
As the teacher was giving Jayant his money,
she said, "You know Jayant, since you are Gujarati, I was very surprised you said Jesus Christ."
Jayant replied, "Yes, in my heart I knew it was Lord Krishna, but business is business!"
JUST FOR FUNNNNNNN
A family in Gujarat was puzzled when the coffin of their dead mother (Ba) arrived from the US. It was sent by one of the daughters.
The dead body was very tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in it when they opened the lid; they found a letter on top addressed to her brothers and sisters:
Dear Chandrakantbhai, Arvindbhai, Smitaben and Varsha, I am sending Ba's body to you, since it was her wish that she should be cremated in the compound of our ancestral home in GUJARAT.
Sorry, I could not come along as all of my paid leave is consumed. You will find inside the coffin, under Ba's body, cans of cheese, 10 packets of Tobler chocolates and 8 packets of Badam (peanuts), please divide these among all of you.
On Ba's feet you will find a new pair of Reebok shoes (size 10) for Mohan. There are also 2 pairs of shoes for Radha's and Lakshmi's sons. Hope the sizes are correct.
Ba is wearing 6 American T-Shirts. The large size is for Mohan. Just distribute the rest among yourselves. The 2 new Jeans that Ba is wearing are for the boys.
The Swiss watch that Reema wanted is on Ba's left wrist. Shanta masi, Ba is wearing the necklace, earrings and ring that you asked for. Please take them off her.
The 6 white cotton socks that Ba is wearing must be divided among my nephews. please distribute all these fairly.
Love Smita.
PS : If anything more required let me know soon as Bapuji is also not feeling too well now a days.
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You can take an Indian out of INDIA
but you cannot take INDIA out of an Indian.
There was once a Gujarati Bhai Patel, owning a shop, living in USA, and he
was involved in a car accident. At the hospital, when he awoke, he called
for the nurse to find out what had happened to him.
"I'm very sorry, sir, but you were involved in a very bad car crash."
"Car crash! My Corolla!! Is my car all right?" he asked hysterically.
"Sir, your car was destroyed, but that is the least of your worries - you lost your left arm in the crash, and we were unable to save it," she said
apologetically.
"I lost my arm? My Swiss Watch! My Swiss Watch!!"
"Sir, please calm down. That is the least of your worries. You are in a very critical condition, but all your family is here to see you."
He asked for his family to be called in. As they gathered around the bed,
he called for each of them by name.
"Alpa, are you here?"
"I am here dear, and I will never leave you", said Mrs. Patel.
"Dinesh, are you here?"
"I am here father, and I will never leave you."
"Kalpesh, are you here?"
"I am here father, and I will never leave you."
"Kamlesh, my son, are you here?"
"I am here father, and I will never leave you."
"Paresh, my child, are you here too?"
"I am here father, and I will never leave you."
"Well" said Patel thoughtfully, "Alpa, Dinesh, Kalpesh, Paresh and Kamlesh are here....... and if all of you are here,...........................................
THAT MEANS NOBODY OPENED THE SHOP THIS MORNING!!!!!????"
WHAT THE HELL YOU ALL ARE DOING HERE????? GO AND OPEN THE SHOP....
I HAVE ALREADY SUFFERED ENOUGH LOSS...I CAN NOT SUFFER MORE LOSS.....PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE.
WORK COMES FIRST.....
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You can take an Indian out of INDIA
but you cannot take INDIA out of an Indian.
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