Advertisement in Music shop: Guitar, for sale.......
cheap...........no strings attached.

Smoking helps you lose weight ... one lung at a
time!

Seen on a bulletin board: Success is relative. More
the success, more
the relatives.

When I read about the evils of drinking...I gave up
reading.

My Grandfather is eighty and still doesn't need
glasses... He drinks
straight out of the bottle.

You know the kids are growing up when your daughter
begins to put on
lipstick or your son starts to wipe it off.

Sign in a bar: "Those of you who are drinking to
forget, please pay
in advance."

If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in
her way.

Behind every great man, there is a surprised woman.

The reason men lie is because women ask so many
questions.

A Spouse is someone who'll stand by you through all
the trouble you
wouldn't have had if you'd stayed single.

Getting caught is the mother of Invention.

Laugh and the world laughs with you, Snore and you
sleep alone.

The surest sign that intelligent life exists
elsewhere in the
universe is the fact that it has never tried to
contact us.

Sign at a barber's saloon in Juhu, Bombay: We need
your heads to run
our business.

A traffic slogan: Don't let your kids drive if they
are not old
enough or else they will never be.

Sign in a restaurant: All drinking water in this
establishment has
been personally passed by the manager.

Sign on a famous beauty parlor window: Don't whistle
at the girl
going out from here. She may be your Grandmother.

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Some people make Things happen, Some watch Things happen, While others wonder what has happened.............

It is rare to find all good ones at one place.....this is a post which has really assimilated the good ones!

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Chandresh

Advice is free – lessons I charge for!!