i am looking for the past 40 years for one.

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You know you are a desi when ........ You spew forth the virtues of India, but don't want to live there...............You've never had a tanning salon membership

Sometimes, over a time, the struggle made by we desis in this part of the world make us self centred and impersonal.. much to the contrast of what we practice in India. Friends back home, discuss even personal matters, grief, joys, finances, earnings and what not. We seldom find anybody do this in this part of the world. Relations here, many a times may begin expecting for some gains, hoping that it would reduce the struggle. This makes us feel the lack of warmth and affection and a sense of belonging.

The man inspite of being a social animal is soon left alone to fend for himself and his family here and pretty soon starts feeling the void. There is hardly anybody to share a moment in real life. All have their own priorities and everyone is on the run.

I think it is this what is making Parag feel lonely and believe me, there would be many many like him. He is not alone. Its forums like these where one vents his/ her heart out.. and I thank CD for providing such a platform.

I may be wrong or there might be exceptions too. But this is my general observation.

Good luck Parag...Happy Diwali. Time for some celebrations!!! Cheer up.

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Lead, Kindly Light!!

Very well written, Bhishma. The few lines that you wrote show an insight into the void that we desis feel and share. As one Polish philosopher said in the USA after immigrating - \" I am not here to be happy, I am here to endure.\" The entire struggle of a man to go to a foreign land, make a living, have a family, make compromises, accept a new reality, adjust to big time identity crisis - all of this is somewhat beautiful?! The West may be a magnet for those desis who might be hyper materialistic but the ones who had higher purposes in life might feel lonely and frusturated at times. That is when a forum like Canadian Desi comes to our rescue - if we are just individuals fending for ourselves then this country might seem like a lonely hell but if we work together as a Community, support each other, then that hell becomes heaven. Canadian Desi shouldn't just be India - centred or Canada - centred, it shouldn't be succeess - centred or failure - centred, it needs to be life - centred and that is when we would feel less lonely! Have Diwali.

You can only have friends; you can not have true or no true friends.
Forget about the adjective “True”.

Relationship changes, nothing is permanent except change.

The question I have in my mind is “how many of us are true to ourselves?

change yourself and learn something from past experience...everyone making fun of you.......you have to give everything from your side to expect something from others....and thats not always money. stop pleading people askin for frdship........first you become a good human being and then good frd.
If you react on my reply that means you didn't learn lesson and I am sure you will never get kind of frd you are lookin for.....if smart enough change yourself...and yes if you want to say bad words you can always email me on yahoo. If you put it here CD guys will remove it.
takecare.........again no hard feelings from my side.....plz don't react and think twice why all this happening with you only....

You will have true friends when you start helping others. Yes outoff those friends you make you find some one who will help you back. The one who will help you back are your true friends. Others are just suckers.

neeraj just a word of advise - why dont you mind your own business? Did I ever invite you to read my post or to reply to my post, who are you to tell me to change myself why dont u change ur nasty attitude your behaviour and your habbit of misusing people and taking undue advantages of them, people like you dont know what is the true meaning of friend all you know is to misuse new immigrants and take undue advantage of them. If you ever tell anyone to change do one thing look at urself in mirror and see who r u and who gave u the rights to tell anyone to change and what are the good qualities in urself that you think u can advise anyone to change, people are making fun of this post is because they have no life and dont know what the true meaning of friendship is so dont ever reply or read my post you have no right never ever in this life whatsoever to give me any wanted suggestions change urself first before u pinpoint anyone else.
Bye forever.