Hi,

I have a question to those that live in a completely white neighborhood. I mean, there are no Desi people in the neighborhood, barring some here and there. How's the day-to-day experience and dealings?

I just saw a house, which is very good, though a bit old but priced ok and within limits. Looks pretty good, and built on a huge lot. The house is in an above average neighborhood (borderline Posh). I am thinking about putting an offer. However, my wife wants to live in a mixed neighborhood. She is educated and a Professional, but her rationale is to have a mixed (mostly Desi) upbringing for our son; lest he would start living his life like the White guys, among white people and follow the most western lifestyle once he grows up. Although, I don't have any issues with it and fine even if he does so, as being a good human being is all that I want from him. I think she is paranoid that he may start living a complete western lifestyle and might leave us to live separately . Even after trying to persuade her that it entirely depends upon our friend circle and the environment at home, she is just adamant. To me, at this point of time, finding an affordable house is the key and priority, which I am not able to. All the Desi areas are way over the mark and even if I am able to obtain the mortgage, one jolt at the job, I will find myself struggling to make ends meet. I really don't want to go back to my struggling days after achieving this good lifestyle.

Can someone please guide me as to how I can best handle this? I can understand where she is coming from, and that my parents might not as well be comfortable living among majority Whites, but I have very few/limited options. All decent houses in Desi areas are not less than 700k. Stretching that far would simply is out of question even if I pay a good chunk of down payment.

Please advise.

Our wives think different, I missed two pretty properties for the same reason as yours. I repent missing the properties but my wife insisted that we live in a balanced area.

I hardly get any active interaction from my neighbors from different background (no offence meant), where as our fellow desi neighbors invariably stopped by , greeted as we were moving in, offered food as they figured it would be a day or two to hit the kitchen, sent their boys to help setting up the furniture despite refusing it, till date there had been many casual chai time in the evenings (mostly in summer) and the elder kids around had been encouraging our kids more than I expected and accommodating them.
Every good part has to have a bad part, the bad part was the desi house owners did not take good care of the property inside, well nothing but sloppy. I did put some good effort to clean it up, it looks decent now. Any property related deals come say roof, lawn, drive way, backyard etc., etc., they share the deal with us, we reciprocate too.

I had to spend some about 12-15K on the house to bring it up to the properties I missed (Well, I bought this 40K cheaper than the other house too). Covering new hardwood, faucets, potligths, wall decors, washroom upgrades, hard top gazebos, interlocking cleanups, outsourced lawn maintenance etc., Well, the flip side is it helped me to settle with some good knowledge on the interior decor (thanks to HGTV, and W shows), got some requests from close friends to help them resurfacing their house decor as it has become my passion. It took about 6-8 months to know what is sold in what shop and pattern of deals to some extent.

The houses around the area are close to the 7 digit mark now, thanks to the soon to doom frenzy that is certainly going to cost me, but the price of the units has some direct relationship to their curb appearance (manicured lawns, stone finished frontage, pattern concrete driveways, lawn lightings)

- Desi dominated area is not bad when it comes to slightly affluent (big debt houses, big debt luxury cars) neighborhood.
- You will be lucky if the house was really maintained well (at least inside).
- My previous property is about a KM from current one, it is a basement heaven (school / traffic / road parking got worse there), not a surprise to see car parked half in the lawn and the lawn condition was beyond comprehension.


I am sure you will be able to pick the gist of the message.

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Originally posted by febpreet

Hi,

I have a question to those that live in a completely white neighborhood. I mean, there are no Desi people in the neighborhood, barring some here and there. How's the day-to-day experience and dealings?

I just saw a house, which is very good, though a bit old but priced ok and within limits. Looks pretty good, and built on a huge lot. The house is in an above average neighborhood (borderline Posh). I am thinking about putting an offer. However, my wife wants to live in a mixed neighborhood. She is educated and a Professional, but her rationale is to have a mixed (mostly Desi) upbringing for our son; lest he would start living his life like the White guys, among white people and follow the most western lifestyle once he grows up. Although, I don't have any issues with it and fine even if he does so, as being a good human being is all that I want from him. I think she is paranoid that he may start living a complete western lifestyle and might leave us to live separately . Even after trying to persuade her that it entirely depends upon our friend circle and the environment at home, she is just adamant. To me, at this point of time, finding an affordable house is the key and priority, which I am not able to. All the Desi areas are way over the mark and even if I am able to obtain the mortgage, one jolt at the job, I will find myself struggling to make ends meet. I really don't want to go back to my struggling days after achieving this good lifestyle.

Can someone please guide me as to how I can best handle this? I can understand where she is coming from, and that my parents might not as well be comfortable living among majority Whites, but I have very few/limited options. All decent houses in Desi areas are not less than 700k. Stretching that far would simply is out of question even if I pay a good chunk of down payment.

Please advise.

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The cowards never started,
The weak died on the way,
Only the strong arrived.
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Thanks JRF. I too am in the favor of living in the mixed neighborhood, however I haven't got any luck in finding the proeperty within my budget. All houses in the mixed neighborhood are not less than 700k here. The one I am currently looking at and planning to send an offer is listed about 100k less, just due to the fact that it is 2 level (ground level has the basement suit and could be rented out) and 26 years old. The house looks good on a 7000 sq. ft lot, that's how I got inclined towards it. In the long run, the value of the land alone will return me my dues. It's low maintenance, clean, with less liability, and I can sleep good at night.

But, you know what, I can see it slipping from my hands. With all the negative vibes, I don't think it's feasible. I am sure, I will have a good story to tell when my son grows-up.

Anyhow!

Quote:

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Originally posted by febpreet

Hi,

I have a question to those that live in a completely white neighborhood. I mean, there are no Desi people in the neighborhood, barring some here and there. How's the day-to-day experience and dealings?

I just saw a house, which is very good, though a bit old but priced ok and within limits. Looks pretty good, and built on a huge lot. The house is in an above average neighborhood (borderline Posh). I am thinking about putting an offer. However, my wife wants to live in a mixed neighborhood. She is educated and a Professional, but her rationale is to have a mixed (mostly Desi) upbringing for our son; lest he would start living his life like the White guys, among white people and follow the most western lifestyle once he grows up. Although, I don't have any issues with it and fine even if he does so, as being a good human being is all that I want from him. I think she is paranoid that he may start living a complete western lifestyle and might leave us to live separately . Even after trying to persuade her that it entirely depends upon our friend circle and the environment at home, she is just adamant. To me, at this point of time, finding an affordable house is the key and priority, which I am not able to. All the Desi areas are way over the mark and even if I am able to obtain the mortgage, one jolt at the job, I will find myself struggling to make ends meet. I really don't want to go back to my struggling days after achieving this good lifestyle.

Can someone please guide me as to how I can best handle this? I can understand where she is coming from, and that my parents might not as well be comfortable living among majority Whites, but I have very few/limited options. All decent houses in Desi areas are not less than 700k. Stretching that far would simply is out of question even if I pay a good chunk of down payment.

Please advise.

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I agree with AT.
As far as I know, Whites will seldom mix with us. Of course, they will smile and do small talk and be good neighbours. During Haloween only, their children will come to you houses.

All my friends in Mississauga, have told me that their white neighbours seldom mix. Of course, they will be friendly on eye to eye contact.

What you should be more worried is the school that your children go to. Habits pick up from the school.. If it is whites majority school, the white culture will catch on. If it is Desi majority , then the Desi culture will hit your son. Living area has very less effect.

During vacations, you children may go to India or just stay at home.

Organize parties (calling only desi's) on weekends and try to go their houses often.

Murali

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Quote:

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Originally posted by febpreet
The one I am currently looking at and planning to send an offer is listed about 100k less, just due to the fact that it is 2 level (ground level has the basement suit and could be rented out) and 26 years old. The house looks good on a 7000 sq. ft lot, that's how I got inclined towards it. In the long run, the value of the land alone will return me my dues. It's low maintenance, clean, with less liability, and I can sleep good at night.

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I have mixed neighbourhood but most of them are whites. I have all three sides white neighbours. I have good relationship with them. 2 are tenants and one is owner. single mom neighbour is a good friend who comes for our bbq parties and birthday parties. there are few Indian and Bangladeshis too but they are too busy earning money and their elder child takes care of younger one while they are at work. How do u expect people to socialise if they are at work since morning 6 am to 8 pm?. Saturday are for kids extra curricular activities like soccer, music etc. Sunday is exclusively resting and cooking and enjoying with their children.

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