Posted on: 02-03-04 00:21:02
>No offence meant.......
>
>A gujju family in gujarat was puzzled when the coffin of their dead
>mother
>arrived from the US. It was sent by one of the daughters.
>
>The dead body was so tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space
>left
>in it !
>
>When they opened the lid , they found a letter on top , which read as
>follows:
>
>Dear brothers and sisters, I am sending our mother's body to you, since
>it
>was her wish that she should be cremated in the compound of our
>ancestral
>home in GUJARAT Sorry, I could not come along as all of my paid leaves
>are
>consumed.
>
>You will find inside the coffin, under Ba's body, 12 cans of cheese, 10
>packets of chocolates and 8 packets of Badam.
>
>Please divide these among all of you.
>
>On Ba's feet you will find a new pair of Reebok shoes(size 10) for
>Mohan.
>
>Also, there are 2 pairs of shoes for Radha's and Lakshmi's sons.
>
>Hope the sizes are correct.
>B a's is wearing 6 American T-Shirts.
>
>The large size is for Mohan and the others are for my nephews. Just
>distribute them! among yourselves.
>
>The 2 new Jeans that Ba's is wearing are for the boys.
>
>The Swiss watch that Rama wanted is on Baa's left wrist.
>
>Shanta Aunty, Ba is wearing the necklace, earrings and ring that you
>asked for.
>
>Please take them.
>
>The 6 white cotton socks that Ba is wearing must be divided among my
>teenager nephews.
>
>Please distribute all these uniformly and if anything more required let
>me know, since our Bappa is also not keeping well nowadays.
HUMMMM>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>.
.
Kinda gross but pretty funny anyways. Specially the last part about Bapuji.
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Are you there?
wow..gross is an understatement!...its on the borderline of bad taste
However, I compliment the fact that you guys can laugh at yourselves too .
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Enjoy reading the following set of funny quotes...seems to be funny..but
most of them..are TRUE
1. Life is pleasant.Death is peaceful.
It's the transition that's troublesome.
2. Arguing with your Boss is like wrestling with a pig in mud.
After a while you realize that while you are getting dirty,
the pig is actually enjoying it.
3. Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you
when he is in trouble again.
4. Complex problems have simple, easy to understand wrong answers.
5. It is not exactly cheating, I prefer to consider it
creative problem solving.
6. Behind every successful woman, is a man who is surprised.
7. Whoever said money can't buy happiness, didn't know where to shop.
8. Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but then again, neither does milk.
9. Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.
10. I'm not a complete idiot, there're still some parts missing!
11. Forgive your enemies but remember their names
12. The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the
stupidity of your action.
13. I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger
to my father.
- He said he wanted more proof.
Sardarji:I want to stich curtain for my computer
Tailor : Why curtain for computer
Sardarji: I got Windows installed on my computer
---------------------------------
Saddam meets Kajol asks her how is life?
Kajol says Kabhi Kushi Kabhi Gum . How about u?
Saddam says Kabhi Bush Kabhi Bomb
--------------------------------
Dil Hai to pyaar hai, Wah,wah,Wah......
pyaar hai to ishq hai, Wah,wah,Wah......
ishq hai to mohabbat hai, Wah,wah,Wah......
Mohabat hai to dard hai, Wah,wah,Wah......
Dard hai to Zandu Balm Hai
----------------------------------------
Teacher asks Who is Raja Ram Mohan Roy?
Sardaarji :They all r 4 best friends
-----------------------------------------
Sardaarji tells his wife
Tum meri Kalpana ho
Tum meri Bhavana ho
Tum meri prerna ho
Wife says :Chalo, aaj sye aap mere liye Dinesh,Rakesh,Suresh ho
---------------------------------
Sardaarji had twins Named Tin & Martin
Again had twins named Peter & Repeater
Again had twins named Max & Climax
Again had Twins got fedup named Tired & Retired
-------------------------------------
Har samundhar mye saahil nahi hota,Wah,wah,Wah......
Har jaahaz mye misile nahi hota, Wah,wah,Wah......
Agar Dhirubhai nahi hota to har lucche kye pass mobile nahi hota
-------------------------------------
Air Hostess asks laloo:Sir are u vegetarian/non-vegetarian
Laloo says I am sagittarian
Air hostess asks:Sir aap Shakahari hai/Mamsahari hai
Laloo says " Main Bihari hoon"
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That was really a very funny collection of jokes. Do u hv sum more??
THERE IS THIS GOOD OLD BARBER IN LONDON.
ONE DAY A FLORIST GOES TO HIM FOR A HAIRCUT. AFTER THE CUT, HE GOES TO
PAY THE BARBER AND
THE BARBER REPLIES:"I AM SORRY. I CANNOT ACCEPT MONEY FROM YOU. I AM
DOING THE COMMUNITY SERVICE."
THE FLORIST IS HAPPY AND LEAVES THE SHOP.
NEXT MORNING WHEN THE BARBER GOES TO OPEN HIS SHOP,
THERE IS A "THANK YOU" CARD AND A DOZEN ROSES WAITING AT HIS DOOR.
POLICEMAN GOES FOR A HAIRCUT AND HE ALSO GOES TO PAY THE BARBER AFTER
THE CUT.
BUT THE BARBER REPLIES: "I AM SORRY. I CANNOT ACCEPT MONEY FROM YOU. I
AM DOING THE COMMUNITY SERVICE. THE COP IS HAPPY AND LEAVES THE SHOP.
THE NEXT MORNING THE BARBER GOES TO OPEN HIS
SHOP, THERE IS A THANK YOU CARD AND A DOZEN DONUTS WAITING AT HIS DOOR.
AN INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER GOES FOR A HAIRCUT AND HE ALSO GOES TO PAY
THE BARBER AFTER THE CUT.
BUT THE BARBER REPLIES: "I AM SORRY. I CANNOT ACCEPT MONEY FROM YOU. I
AM DOING THE COMMUNITY SERVICE. "
THE INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER IS HAPPY AND LEAVES.
THE NEXT MORNING WHEN THE BARBER GOES TO OPEN HIS SHOP,
GUESS WHAT HE FINDS THERE...
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CAN YOU GUESS?
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TRY TO GUESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
??????
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COME ON, THINK LIKE AN INDIAN.................
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A DOZEN INDIANS WAITING FOR A HAIRCUT...
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