we are a family of three people. after we came here first thing what we did is put our daughter in the preschool. we went some places decided for this preschool which is walking distance from our place.
what made us feel bad is even after paying real price our dayghter is not happy to go there. she has been going to preschool from one and half year now. she felt bad whenever she could not go to preschool. here she trys to show us in a way that if she can remain home.
we also observed that the teachers / attenders in preschool leave the kids on their own, they dont go out - they are very much there - but not recommending kids to do something. they say let the kid use his/her imagination.
we live in north etobicoke area. we are also looking to move. at the same we are looking for good school as our daughter will be going to school. so we may shift to that place.
requesting you all to put yout suggestion about it.
thanks
Rathi

Hi Rathi,
We are also a family of three and we have a daughter who is 2 years now. We started leaving her at the daycare when she was 7 months. Before we were living in downtown Toronto and we used a private day care. It was a West Indian lady's house and she had about 4-5 kids. After that, we moved to Etobicoke and then we were leaving her at another private day care (again West Indian lady), again 4-5 kids. At both places, our daughter was very happy. Then beginning of this year, we changed her day care centre from private home day care to professional day care (Humber College) where there are more than 15 kids in Toddlers' section, all are almost same age. Initially, she could not adjust there. She usd to cry a lot every morning whenever we were droppong her at the centre. We felt very bad but we did not have any other choice. Now, its been more than two months at the same centre and she gets very excited, the moment I stop my car in front of Day care centre. I don't know why, but I could share our observation with you, may be or may not be helpful for you:
We noticed that when we moved our daughter to a bigger day care, she was NOT getting that kind of attention which she used to get at a smaller one. She felt lonely. It was the same situation when we join a new company and other than HR person or our manager, no one else knows us. So, we observed her behaviour and the attendants' behaviour (In Humber college, you can legally do that and that too secretly, even the attendants would not know about that) and we found the same thing. My wife did that 'secret visit' for 4-5 times in a month, they call it: surprise visit. She also showed the same thing to the Centre Supervisor also. Then we instructed them about the food pattern of our daughter and how she should be treated if she is being rude to other kids or some other unacceptable behaviour. Because she was feeling lonely and no one was giving proper attention to her. These attendants are on Salary basis, they hardly care......you have to tell them or Teach them.....believe me, they can not argue with you!!
Our Indian kids are habitual of 'GODI' and 'personal attention' whereas these whites/blacks are not, thats why it takes some time for us and our kids to get adjusted with these 'Emotionless' people but now, by the grace of GOD, our daughter is happy there and she knows the trick : IF SHE HAS TO GET SOMEBODY'S ATTENTION, SHE WILL PULL HIS/HER PANTS OR WILL PAT ON THE LEG MOREOVER, SHE IS THE ONLY INDIAN KID AMONG THE LOT, SO NATURALLY SHE STANDS OUT!!

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Sanjeev Manocha, MBA
Real Estate Sales Representative
Accredited Buyer Representative (ABR)

Re/Max West Realty Inc, Brokerage
96, Rexdale Blvd., Toronto

Mobile: 416-843-7600
Office: 416-745-2300
http://www.manocharealty.com" rel="nofollow">LINK

Hi Sanjeev,
Thanks for the info.
Rathi

Hi Rathi,
You dont need me to tell you this but all kids are different even in the same family. My daughter was extremely sensitive to changes in her surroundings(including people) and she had a hard time adapting to some daycares we had to pull her out of 2 of these.

On the other hand she absolutely loved other day cares and we used to threaten her that she would not be allowed to go to daycare if she did not behave...thats how much she loved one them.

Heres the strategy we use now and have come upon this with trial and error right until today, some are more obvious than others.
1) Firstly the staff:
We now look for staff who are there out of a passion for kids and not because of a job. Though one should not generalise, the difference is easy to tell. a)If the staff are younger and have chosen childcare as a career e.g: university studies in childcare etc. Such youngsters are idealistic and love what they do. They are also energetic and the kids love that. Their passion also comes across in the way they are innovative about various fun activities. These teachers are great for kids 2-5. Younger kids may benefit with more mature teachers with lots of maternal instincts.
b)If the staff is mostly people who do not speak good English or French(in quebec), its not a good sign. We had a bad experience with a school that had a majority of immigrants as teachers. We did not initially bother much about the fact that the teachers were immigrants from places like India, Egypt, Phillipines and Argentina. However, we slowly realised that none of the teachers spoke French or English well and also that the person who ran the daycare preferred to hire immigrants who did not know much about their rights and who did not stand much of a chance in the normal job market. We pulled our kids out when we found out that there were various other illegal activities including spiking childrens milk with water,going on there. This wasa daycare run under the 'mont***' name with uniforms and all that. Also it cost us 15$/day along with more for extra curricular activities that never happened. This in quebec where the govt subsidises the daycares for 5$/day. The last I heard was that the Indian teacher was fighting a court case with a parent because she abused one of the kids, I guess she thought could abuse kids just like some teachers do in India. There is also a police investigation going on at the school.

So due to all this we now look for teachers/caregivers who are younger and preferably born and bought up here, who have spent a few years of education(university) in childcare/education.

2) Student to teacher ratio. I think legally it is supossed to be 8-1. You should check what it is in Ontario. The bad school, which I mentioned above, used to hide some kids on the upper floors to show an acceptable ratio to the inspectors( who in their wisdom used to come in announced)

3)The normal stuff like cleanliness, summer activities, field trips, arts, music, karate,yoga, ballet etc.

4) Parental involvement. Normally daycares that insist that one of the parents volunteer their time(maybe once a month) and have meetings where parents meet one another etc...are better run.

The schools which my daughter loved either had great teachers, or/and she made great friends (and felt accepted). She loved the bad daycare mentioned earlier because she made two very thick friends there.

My son on the other hand, who has been in and out of daycares since he was 8 months...fits into any daycare after a period of 1 week. We had an experience with another set of teachers who are there for the convenience (and again, unfortunately, first-gen immigrants from our part of the world) and pulled him out of his part-time daycare just today.

Telling a small kid to always use his/her imagination is not a good thing in my view. If it is for a cpl of hrs a day thats ok. However, if its for the major part of the day that a child is expected to use his/her imagination and there is not much time devoted to structured/supervised activities, I dont think its good for the child.

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We did not initially bother much about the fact that the teachers were immigrants from places like India, Egypt, Phillipines and Argentina. However, we slowly realised that none of the teachers spoke French or English well and also that the person who ran the daycare preferred to hire immigrants who did not know much about their rights and who did not stand much of a chance in the normal job market. We pulled our kids out………………………………
We had an experience with another set of teachers who are there for the convenience (and again, unfortunately, first-gen immigrants from our part of the world)……………………………
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On one hand, we say that Canada is made of immigrants and we at Canadian Desi, are trying to educate people and make them aware that how to get adjusted in Canadian Life, how to find jobs, how to overcome initial struggle's stress etc..etc... and on the other hand, we are trying to say that immigrants , not only from India but from other countries too, are not fit to come here and do jobs esp. Teachers and day care attendants....because some of them might now speak 'well english'?
How do we define well English? an American says: I don know NOTHIN.......that is well English and an Indian might say: I do not know ANYTHING.......that might be bad English because his accent may be heavy and he tries to utter all the words clearly instead of just rolling his tongue in the mouth, without even opening his mouth....(sounds like he is too lazy to even say proper words!)
If immigrants' English is so bad then why Canadian Govt. invites them here or allows them to work in schools or day care centres or any where else?
Probably, its not a question of immigrants or English or passion to kids or birth in Canada, its a question of your own upbringing as a child! If you were brought up in a clean environment, clean house where you had to take a bath everyday, you were not allowed to 'Maro Kalti' from the school just because you didn't feel like going school..., you would wake up every morning early, brush your teeth, take bath, do little part of your 'Puja Path' (depends on the faith) , get ready for school, comb hair and then come to Break fast table instead of straight taking the breakfast in the bed, then use washroom, no need to take bath or brush teeth....(getting late ......take out one Cloret from the pack and then rush to school...(NO OFFENCES TO ANY BODY.......)and so on...........then you would also know how to raise or take care of kids.......DOES NOT MATTER WHETHER YOU HAVE ANY DEGREE OR FORMAL EDUCATION OR PASSION FOR KIDS or not but it all depends on 'FAMILY CULTURE' which we call " SANSKAR"........
I have seen and have been to houses of so called Canadian born, good English speaking persons who live like animals...... smoke cigrattes in the basements while a 6 month's child is sleeping in the crib near by, their houses smell like Gutters......never bother to have bath at any regular time or even days.......start taking break fast and suddenly felt the 'PRESSURE' AND RUSHED TO LATRINE WITH THAT BURGER IN HAND...... .....
Anyway, here I am trying to make a point that being white skin or black skin does not mean that you love kids and you live better life than any BROWN skin and we all (mostly) are first generation immigrants here and if we start looking down upon other first generation immigrants, not necessarily Indians but other countries too, then probably we are encouraging and provoking those elements of the society who do not want that immigrants should be successful here in Canada in terms of adapting to new life, career, family or whatever way........
Whoever comes here as IMMIGRANT (on point basis esp.) is not a roadside beggar , he has not been migrated just because he begged but because Canadian Govt. allowed him/her happily for immigration and language fluency, English was one of the criteria!!!!!!

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Sanjeev Manocha, MBA
Real Estate Sales Representative
Accredited Buyer Representative (ABR)

Re/Max West Realty Inc, Brokerage
96, Rexdale Blvd., Toronto

Mobile: 416-843-7600
Office: 416-745-2300
http://www.manocharealty.com" rel="nofollow">LINK

Sanjeev,
I'm not sure how you drew the conclussions you did but let me put it in bullet form for more clarity if it helps people who see things like you do.

1) The focusof my example was on \" the person who ran the daycare preferred to hire immigrants who did not know much about their rights and who did not stand much of a chance in the normal job market.\"

2) People who choose to follow childcare as a career due to a passion (i.e: they love kids) are better for kids unlike those who chose a job just for the sake of finding a job. From my experience most fist gen immigrants(OF EVERY COLOR) fit into the latter category. You will notice that even after my first horrendeous experience I still chose to put my kids into another daycare run by first-gen immigrants. The focus was on how AGAIN these turned out to be people who were there for convenience and not out of a love for kids.

3) Good english..meaning good grammar. 'I dont know nothing', is in my books, bad English irrespective of the fact that it is spoken by an american or a madrasi. Good english does not have anything to do with accent. Look up previous threads where I have repeatedly said that people should not try to change their accent.
Being born in Canada or America does not mean that one will speak good English either(unlike what you seem to think/suggest in your post). Infact, I've known many Canadian/Americans (born in NA) whose english does not come close to that of some Indians I know.
Good english, is a learning process and I learn each time I write/speak/read. The fact that I dont like is, when my kids spoil their grammar ( which I could teach them with my limited knowledge) because of the influences of their caregivers. Its my RIGHT to expect more from those that take care of my kids. I do not expect you, or anyone else on this board to speak good english nor do I think its a crime not to know good english. However, if you want me to pay you to take care of my kids, you can be damn sure I want your English to be better than my 6 yr old's.


4)

Quote:

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Orginally posted by sanjeevm

Anyway, here I am trying to make a point that being white skin or black skin does not mean that you love kids and you live better life than any BROWN skin

Quote:

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I really PITY you if you somehow concluded that I said having white or black skin meant you love kids better OR LEAD A BETTER LIFE (where did that come from?...are you sure you should not be resting?). I said my criteria were \"So due to all this we now look for teachers/caregivers who are younger and preferably born and bought up here, who have spent a few years of education(university) in childcare/education.\" AS ANY SANE person can understand, this means people of every color. Brown/blue/turquoise Included.

5)I am a first-gen immigrant and so is my wife and so are many of my good friends. If any of them (including MY WIFE OR ME) were running a daycare without passion for kids and just for the money, I would not recommend that you leave your kids with them. The focus again, is on people doing childcare when they are not passionate about it, not that immigrants or anyone else are unfit for certain jobs. If you are working with my KIDS I EXPECT you to be passionate about what you are doing.
On the other hand I dont care less if you are not passionate about some other job(say software/accounting/graphics/insurance) and are doing it just for the money.

6)

Quote:

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Orginally posted by sanjeevm

Whoever comes here as IMMIGRANT (on point basis esp.) is not a roadside beggar , he has not been migrated just because he begged but because Canadian Govt. allowed him/her happily for immigration and language fluency, English was one of the criteria!!!!!!

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No sir, you are not a beggar, nor am I. Infact, i am looking for the person who called us a beggar and I agree to bring him to task, when I do. . Not every ones English is the same. Some speak 'well english'and some speak 'good english'. I'm somewhere in between. Some people who come on the same point system speak better English than me and some are worse at the same. I think both have an equal right to be here. Both DO NOT have an equal right to expect me to pay them to take care of my kids.

I somehow dont think you will understand what I am trying to say so I'll stop.There are very few BL's, greycells,MI's etc here who inhabit a different headspace so I'm wondering about the futile exercise of writing this post. I guess there is always hope.

I'm sorry, if like you and many others, I do not see the reason to talk degradingly about any other culture/race/nationality inorder to feel superior. If anything, I find that it appeals to ones baser instinct and not conducive to higher thought. Any extreme right wing politician relies on this more than anything else . It does not take a genius to find faults of others. It is easier to do than to try understand someone elses culture. One of these requires more intellectual effort and true compassion than the other(which relies more on ignorance). You find misfits in every culture. Being an Indian/American/Canadian is not a prerequisite for cleanliness, hygiene or reasoning abilities .

I think my cultural heritage and race can stand on its own two feet, very handsomely, without having to point out how bad another culture/peoples/race is. I am very proud of the contributions of my race and people to human kind. I think each one of us should feel so without having to focus on the shortcomings(real or imagined), of another culture/race/nationality.

In India you rightly say that if you respect someone elses mother you respect your own. You cannot do one without doing the other.