Who is responsible for fulfilling your dreams/goals???


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desi in ottawa   
Member since: May 04
Posts: 1627
Location:

Post ID: #PID Posted on: 09-03-08 13:59:02

Friday night I was at a party and something caught my attention. There was a discussion on who is responsible for fulfilling individual dreams/goals. As usual, I jumped in. IMO, every adult individual is responsible for his/her own dreams/goals, not others. I was very vocal abt this. Some women got upset abt my stance (if they are upset it does not bother me). Their argument was that their husbands should look after the dreams/goals (of the wife).

Anyways, I stood my ground supported by the men folk (other women whom I think wanted to support me kept quiet due to sort of peer pressure from other women who were upset with my argument)

What CDs think abt this? Are the husbands responsible for fulfilling the dreams/goals of their wives? No chauvinism here please.

DIO



Maharaj   
Member since: Oct 02
Posts: 1721
Location: Brampton

Post ID: #PID Posted on: 09-03-08 22:57:04

Quote:
Originally posted by desi in ottawa
What CDs think abt this? Are the husbands responsible for fulfilling the dreams/goals of their wives? No chauvinism here please.


It depends what that dream is ...
If the dream is to get marry & be mother of two lovely kids - I am sorry, you loose your argument. Husband is responsible. There are ways out, but husbands don't like that :)

On a serious note, I only can say that Your argument stands good only if Husband is responsible enough to understand the responsibility.



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Mumbai Maazi Ladki ...


shriya   
Member since: Sep 06
Posts: 121
Location: everywhere

Post ID: #PID Posted on: 10-03-08 06:59:57

IMO, If a husband can become more responsible (or share it), then a wife can take care of her dreams;)

Shriya


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you may be someone to the world but for someone you are the world.


905Desi   
Member since: Feb 08
Posts: 279
Location: Greater Toronto Arena

Post ID: #PID Posted on: 10-03-08 08:09:43

Quote:
Originally posted by desi in ottawa

IMO, every adult individual is responsible for his/her own dreams/goals, not others.



life is what YOU make of it.

Be Empowered! Live Large!


.
.
...


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happily holi day!


viggy   
Member since: Aug 07
Posts: 569
Location:

Post ID: #PID Posted on: 10-03-08 09:28:39

Quote:
Originally posted by desi in ottawa

Friday night I was at a party and something caught my attention. There was a discussion on who is responsible for fulfilling individual dreams/goals. As usual, I jumped in. IMO, every adult individual is responsible for his/her own dreams/goals, not others. I was very vocal abt this. Some women got upset abt my stance (if they are upset it does not bother me). Their argument was that their husbands should look after the dreams/goals (of the wife).

Anyways, I stood my ground supported by the men folk (other women whom I think wanted to support me kept quiet due to sort of peer pressure from other women who were upset with my argument)

What CDs think abt this? Are the husbands responsible for fulfilling the dreams/goals of their wives? No chauvinism here please.

DIO




I would say both need to support each others dreams and goals, but one will have drive the dream themselves.

My thought -> If the wife wants to become a successful - businesswoman, architect, designer, what ever - she only can do it. I think, in general and particularly among desi's, the major chunk of wife's time goes after being 'the mother of two lovely kids'. This, for a family first/oriented desi wife, probably translates to no time for pursuing own dream, which kind of leads to 'I am taking care of kids and house, so my husband needs to ensure that my dreams are achieved'..

(I sincerly hope my wife is not going to read this thread!!)



905Desi   
Member since: Feb 08
Posts: 279
Location: Greater Toronto Arena

Post ID: #PID Posted on: 10-03-08 16:51:22

Quote:
Originally posted by viggy

Quote:
Originally posted by desi in ottawa

Friday night I was at a party and something caught my attention. There was a discussion on who is responsible for fulfilling individual dreams/goals. As usual, I jumped in. IMO, every adult individual is responsible for his/her own dreams/goals, not others. I was very vocal abt this. Some women got upset abt my stance (if they are upset it does not bother me). Their argument was that their husbands should look after the dreams/goals (of the wife).

Anyways, I stood my ground supported by the men folk (other women whom I think wanted to support me kept quiet due to sort of peer pressure from other women who were upset with my argument)

What CDs think abt this? Are the husbands responsible for fulfilling the dreams/goals of their wives? No chauvinism here please.

DIO




I would say both need to support each others dreams and goals, but one will have drive the dream themselves.

My thought -> If the wife wants to become a successful - businesswoman, architect, designer, what ever - she only can do it. I think, in general and particularly among desi's, the major chunk of wife's time goes after being 'the mother of two lovely kids'. This, for a family first/oriented desi wife, probably translates to no time for pursuing own dream, which kind of leads to 'I am taking care of kids and house, so my husband needs to ensure that my dreams are achieved'..

(I sincerly hope my wife is not going to read this thread!!)



agree - "she only can do it." ... if she wanted to BE an architect (or whatever), only she can do so. .. not her husband.


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happily holi day!


HelloG   
Member since: Jan 08
Posts: 338
Location: vasudhev kutumbkam

Post ID: #PID Posted on: 10-03-08 17:39:03

desi in ottawa I think its not good to become enemies just because people disagree on certain issues.
From what i think about it, I'll just create a dialogue between Mrs. & Mr.Pardesi.

Husband:'Honey you yourself have to fulfill your dreams'

Wife:'tell me how can I do it dear when I am so much engrosed in the household chores, kids and other things'

Husband:'I don't know but don't you expect me to fulfill your dreams '

Wife:'I had a career and had to quit to take responsibility of the house,kids and just about everything (paying bills,doing grocery,laundry etc) to make your life comfortable.You just have to go to work..come back and relax on the couch while enjoying tea and snacks while i cook some tasty and interesting food for you...what about that...when do i think about my career'

Husband:'what are you getting at...are you hinting that i do household chores..don;t even go there...By the way can i have 1 cup of tea more'
Ok if you can earn more than me ..i'll sit at home and you go out'

Wife:'how is this possible..i have been out of work for 5years and need to polish my skills before i land in some descent job'

Husband:'there you go...'
wife cries and moves out the room and husband switches channels.:cry:

Moral of the story is:
Husband WIfe are wheels of a cart and have to take load equally to stike the balance.Either they share every responsibility equally and work towards acheiving their dreams as well OR they divide responsibilities depending on their own priorities of life. :k

NOTE:I AM VERY FORTUNATE NOT TO HAVE HUSBAND LIKE THAT. I WAS LUCKY TO GET RIGHT OPPORTUNITIES AT RIGHT TIME TO MAKE MY CAREER.
Now I am a happy mother watching her kids grow each moment while on my maternity leave and getting constant push from my hubby to study instead of going back to work( which i have agreed bacause my comany is closing down anyway! easy decision now:idea: ) so that i can devleop more skills and thereby my chances to be even more closer to my dream jobs!!!
:lovers:





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