Posted on: 11-06-08 17:14:53
Quote:
If the person is not happy with his wife, even if the other woman is out of his life, their present married life will create a different set of problems for their daughter.
That's all good assuming he's had a lot of issues with his wife and the new relationship is an offspring of that conflict. There's no details but somehow I didn't catch that from DIO's original post. It sounds like this Romeo is just attracted to another lady and that can happen even if you're getting along ok with your wife. (notice I said "ok", not "madly in love" )
Agreed, if he's constantly bickering with his wife and has tried counselling and stuff with no positive results, he might as well divorce her.
Either way, the poor kid is the biggest loser.
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Are you there?
Quote:
Originally posted by Loser
HE is better of Divorcing her . It will be better then the desis i meet in the strip bars. Most of them are married with children.
huh? Are you likening having an extra-marital affair that turns a few lives upside down to going to a strip club? Not sure I get the connection.
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Are you there?
Thx CDs. I am learning something after I read the posts.
Spoke to him to make sure that he shows up this evening. During the conversation, without me broaching the subject, he said "if my wife does not come to know, then everything will be just fine".
I cant respond to these things. I am good in listening, but when it comes to giving advice, I am lost. Told him to come this evening. Let's see what he says.
DIO
Quote:
Originally posted by desi in ottawa
I cant respond to these things. I am good in listening, but when it comes to giving advice, I am lost. Told him to come this evening. Let's see what he says.
DIO
So True, I'll be lost too ... coz I just can't see myself in his Shoe to advise him.
It sounds more of the result of Loneliness ... but who knows.
It could be because of sour relationship - why is family not here to begin with? What is wife doing back home? Why to assume that the guy is at fault? If he is living Miserable Life - he cannot make Better Life for anyone else.
Try to understand 'where he is coming from' and might just be able to give him some words ...
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Mumbai Maazi Ladki ...
It is indeed a difficult situation for DIO but hes the only person who can pull his friend out of this insanity. Try to find out the reason your friend got into this messy situation, ruining so many lives.
Ask him about
-his reaction if it was his wife who had an affair outside marriage.
-repercurtion of this affair on his daughter when she finds out ( may be after few years when she is mature enough)
-family's reaction when they come to know.-is he doing this because his wife is incompatible emotionaly economically etc..there is counselling he can take help.
-is he going through a rough phase in life be it at work or home and trying to find solace with this woman .
DO NOT Condem him coz then he may stop confiding in you. You will have to be very tactfull and keep your cool too . Let him tell his side of story and then answer your questions.Then you can convey your feelings too IFF he is all ears to you.
Tell him his affair cannot be a hush hush thing ,if thats whats on his mind coz eventually the cat will be out of the bag. How traumatizing will it be for his wife when she finds out.
Marriage is such a beautiful and precious institution.It hurts to see people abusing and insulting it. We all need to be loved and have warm companioship but why not work to enjoy all this within your marriage. After all you did love your spouse once upon a time, then why not revive it!
deleted
Agreeing to Bl, HelloG 's posts,
Being"madly in love" or saying "Only if my wife doesnt come to know..........."
if your friend is just trying "to have the best of both worlds"
Stop being his listener/advisor.
But ..,If he believes he is "really" in love with either one of them,then go for it and face the consequences. Agree to his decision and support him
Just try not to let the kid suffer whatever the decision is.
Shriya.
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