Tigercanada, I appreciate ur concerns...we were determined to keep the child with us before landing here, eventho a lot of friends warned us to leave the child behind...until we settle...

Me and my wife had some serious medical conditions too and never thought stress would make it severly worse and unmanageable...

For example, I used to get depression and was on medication...think about how stress will affect it..

My wife had hyper thyroid...and again stress is the worst enemy....

we come from well to do families and had extensive family support back home..

Here, nobody to assist us..guide us...we new parents with a six month old child... My wife's thyroid situation got so worse that she had to be admitted in hospital for days under emergency medical conditions and too say 5 or 6 times... I had severe episodes of depression... and who'll look after the child.. ???

We were breast feeding our child...my wife's milk stopped one month after landing in Canada due to stress.. we were getting nowhere.. and do u agree a six month child needs somebody to take care of her 24 hrs a day???

AND I ASSURE YOU, IT WAS NEVER THE MONEY, IT WAS A FIGHT FOR SURVIVAL AND THE DETERMINATION TO FIGHT IT OUT FOR A LAST CHANCE BEFORE GIVING IN AND ADMITTING FAILURE...

edit: Jona, thanks for ur replies..really appreciate whatever u r telling us..just saw ur reply now...

Warrior,
It should not be a big deal, bringing your daughter to Canada. Get a notorised authorisation from your wife stating that she is wiiling that your child can acompany your daughter to Canada.
I hope that you would have been speaking regularly with your daughter over the phone and hence she must herself be quite willing to come to you. I know about a 4 year relative of mine who had never seen her father and always was with her mother and gradparents and yet she used to be so happy to get a call from her dad and she went to USA with her mother to be reunited with her father. Donot worry. Malayalees in the gulf do it all the time and in no time have i seen any problem.
Jona had given all vaild points. I would like to add also that when you go to India, show that you are in very good terms with your daughter's grandparents. This in turn will reinforce the trust that you daughter will have with you. She will feel that any person who has the blessing of her grandparents (who brought her up) will be a genuine person.
No one will object (Either in the plane , India or during transit at the airports) to your daughter using the Men's washroom with you. So donto worry on that front. Even in a shopping mall in Canada, I have seen a 6-8 year old girl accompanying her dad, while her dad was using the urinal.
Lastly, I caution you not to share personal information on this board. There are some people whjo take joy in rediculing people who release personal information that has happened in their lives and this in turn will turn this thread as a free for all board. Please use PM to convey such messages.
Best of luck in your endeavours.

TK A

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I am a Gents and not a Ladies.

Jona,

Till recently she would ask us when we were coming to take her back to Canada... Now she is not willing to come here... I think everybody is talking back home about me coming to take her...and thats frieghtening her..and she senses something is going to happen soon... her whole attitude has changed...before she would happily go out to friends/relatives house..now she abolutely refuses to go out of the home unless one of my grand parents accompany her...

SHe used to pray till recently to god to "allow her to go to Canada safely"... Now my parents are surprised to hear her pray " PLs god, don't allow me to go to Canada..."

She doesnt have the courage to say that to me or my wife in phone, but told me a few days back that she will come here but wont stay here for long..she'll go back at the earliest....

That can be little tough on you but still the battle is not lost. She's a child and can change her thinking but you'll have to put in efforts for her to do that. When next time she tells you she will come to Canada but not stay longer you can tell her "No problem" she can come back whenever she wants. Reassure her...respect her feelings. Don't let her feel you are snatching away her from her grandparents. TK is right let your parents also explain her that they are not far away and can visit her. Your parents can tell her to tell them how is Canada because they have never been to a foreign land...and wonder what it is like. Let her feel special. Tell her not many friends of her are privileged to visit countries and Canada is so special and beautiful. Weave stories for her....make up something...but never lie. Make sure whatever you tell her she should not be disappointed later.

When she's here you'll have to spend a lot of time with her. Does she know English? You'll have to work on that too otherwise she can feel isolated at her playschool too. Set up her room before you go from here...buy toys for her and click pictures...show her the pictures of her bed, blanket...toys which will be all hers when she's here. In the beginning make sure she sleeps in your room with you and wife. If the child is not accustomed to sleeping alone...they can get frightened. Mostly I'll repeat myself...give her love...respect....and she'll be all yours.

Jona

Oh my god,
why didn't I think of that... thats a beautiful idea...to show her "her room and toys" in Canada.....See how poor I'm as a dad???

You have really shed some light n hope for me...atleast I'm starting to believe in my ability to be a dad to her...

PLeese, if u think of some idea or get any new ones, feel free to post it here...

I just got one more day to go...13th is my date of travel and be back her on 5th july...

Hope everything goes well...