Hi to all Sakhis,

Anyone there who has gone for a second child after 35? Moved to Canada 3 years ago but didn't feel settled here till now. We have a 10 year old who was born in India. Now me and my husband are toying with the idea of going for another child... we are both healthy and fit but since I'm 36 and he is 40, we are very concerned about the health problems it might create for the newborn child! Want to have a healthy child or not have it at all... we are happy with one kid!

Any Sakhi gone thru' this experience? Experience speaks better than all the medical information out there which we have already researched!

Hi

i too had a 8 yr old born in India. I had a baby at 36 yrs in US , no problem at all . you knowyour body if you had no prob with the first chances are there wont be any the 2nd time around. the problems we are having is with the expence and we had got useeed to having a big kid in the family but to bring up a baby here is lot tougher so if you are OK with that and are financially fine then go ahead. it is your life you know it best.

thanks for the reply.... I'm sure you know how these emotions are ... one day they are encouraging, the other day they are not! It's almost like 'what am I thinking!', 'why do I want to disrupt my settled life now?'.
Hope for you the gap between the kids isn't a problem day- to -day.
Anyway, thanks for the reply!

Quote:

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Orginally posted by Janmeja

Hi

i too had a 8 yr old born in India. I had a baby at 36 yrs in US , no problem at all . you knowyour body if you had no prob with the first chances are there wont be any the 2nd time around. the problems we are having is with the expence and we had got useeed to having a big kid in the family but to bring up a baby here is lot tougher so if you are OK with that and are financially fine then go ahead. it is your life you know it best.

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you know what . we think that every day. but the way we took it was that we are anyway so far away from our family and our elder son will be happy to have a brother/ sister as they grow up. it is a full day everday bet the day care and work everyday. but in the whole run it will be good. evertime we see the little fellow. i dont think we made a mistake.it is tough bringing up a child in this country . i used to take things for granted back home. we have help and grand parents around.
best of luck.

Been there...done that. Well not me, but my wife.

We came here with a 7 yr old. By the time we settled and debated & decided to have a 2nd, my wife was around 36ish. Both girls are 11 yrs apart. It's tough to go back in history and do things what you did 11 years ago, but at the end of the day, we don't repent our decision. Yes, she had to sacrifice a lot from a career perspective, but overall no regrets. It just gives the older one the joy to say - 'yes I do have a younger sister'

..and whoever said with that age difference the kids will get along well, please visit me. When I see the 2 girls fighting, I sometimes start pulling my hair..., but OTOH if we scould one of them the other is quick in defending

If you'd like to speak with either of us, PM me, and I'll email U my contact details.

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Reiki Grand Master

Ultimately it all depends how much u r willing to sacrifice on your career / freedom to enjoy the new comer!!!

We had our 2nd after 5 yrs and initially it felt good, but as time passes, we miss our \\\\'LARGER\\\\' family we had in india, not for the day care, but for smaller issues concerning bringing up kids, inbibe values, teach them the ways etc.. which my elder one picked up without much effort on our side, just being part of a bigger family and having more freinds to learn from. He does have some freinds here, but there is a difference. Here you will have to give up a lot of your freedom and maybe a career if you wish to raise them with your cultural values else leave them alone (not 100%, but fairly) to learn on thier own.

It surely is a very important decision especially when you have just started to feel settled...

All the best and do share your decision with fellow CDs.

Hiren

I hope you dont mind if i ask an aside question on your thread:

What do CD Posters think about the childfree lifestyle? Or having only one child (commonly called \"onlies\"

Many couples in north america are choosing not to have children.

What do you think?

myself..im undecided - at age 30.

Thanks

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~ Morning rain