Quote:
Orginally posted by morning_rain
Chandresh,
However as you mentioned you dont see the point of a tradition which tells girls to stay out of the kitchen during their period - why subject your daughter to it in India (Just from an argumentative standpoint).. Why not teach the grandparents that this is not what you believe in.
I did not say I did not believe in the tradion - I very much do and for scientific reasons. Only thing is, I find it might or does, conflict with our lifestyle here in Canada and so I don't expect my daughter/wife to follow that here.
And yes, I do discuss lots of things with parents and try to make them change themselves with time. One of the cases I distinctly remember is - eating non-veg. When I grew up, my mother always said that if ever I touched non-veg food, I would be kicked out of the house. This is something I did not agree to......I could not find a valid reason in her point. So Idid respect her views and slowly tried to change it. We finally settled on the point that I could eat non-veg outside the house, but never bring anything home.
So I was able to respect her values, as well as make her change for me so that it suited me too.
Chandresh
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Chandresh
Advice is free – lessons I charge for!!
Quote:
Orginally posted by Azazf
Quote:
Orginally posted by Janmeja
I Really resent that. Do you realise if the girl is an only child how painful it is for the girls parents. to be contantly treated as if they dont matter . there are some traditions that need to be scraped . how about giving them equal consideration.
I dont think you should resent that becuase no two sets of families are the same. What your family thinks right might be totally different in mine.
For you personally that might be the case......If I have a daughter and she does that I'd feel proud...........but than again I am old fashioned. I have a sister and she is like that and we dont have a problem with that
How correct!
Chandresh
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Chandresh
Advice is free – lessons I charge for!!
Posts: 1920
Location: British Columbia
Posted on: 27-01-06 14:51:38
Location: British Columbia
Posted on: 27-01-06 14:51:38
Quote:
Orginally posted by chandresh
Quote:
Orginally posted by morning_rain
Chandresh,
However as you mentioned you dont see the point of a tradition which tells girls to stay out of the kitchen during their period - why subject your daughter to it in India (Just from an argumentative standpoint).. Why not teach the grandparents that this is not what you believe in.
I did not say I did not believe in the tradion - I very much do and for scientific reasons. Only thing is, I find it might or does, conflict with our lifestyle here in Canada and so I don't expect my daughter/wife to follow that here.
And yes, I do discuss lots of things with parents and try to make them change themselves with time. One of the cases I distinctly remember is - eating non-veg. When I grew up, my mother always said that if ever I touched non-veg food, I would be kicked out of the house. This is something I did not agree to......I could not find a valid reason in her point. So Idid respect her views and slowly tried to change it. We finally settled on the point that I could eat non-veg outside the house, but never bring anything home.
So I was able to respect her values, as well as make her change for me so that it suited me too.
Chandresh
Ok.
As I said earlier, I dont meant to offend you.
We can agree to disagree on this.
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~ Morning rain
The tradition in India is that a girl is "Laxmi" but they treat her "Per ki jutti" Our parents bring us up with as much difficulty as any other parent of a boy. but as soon as we get married our parents have to take a back seat in our lives. when it comes to customs where one has to give money then it is the girls side who has to do everything but when they have "SEWA" it should all be for the in laws. I see girls who live away from their parents for years and when they go home they get only a few days to spend with their own family.
Posts: 1920
Location: British Columbia
Posted on: 27-01-06 16:58:54
Location: British Columbia
Posted on: 27-01-06 16:58:54
Quote:
Orginally posted by Janmeja
The tradition in India is that a girl is "Laxmi" but they treat her "Per ki jutti" Our parents bring us up with as much difficulty as any other parent of a boy. but as soon as we get married our parents have to take a back seat in our lives. when it comes to customs where one has to give money then it is the girls side who has to do everything but when they have "SEWA" it should all be for the in laws. I see girls who live away from their parents for years and when they go home they get only a few days to spend with their own family.
I hope its ok if I make a comment.
It sounds like its tradition vs. Individual preferences
Is it still this traditional in India? Is society changing or not really?
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~ Morning rain
Quote:
Orginally posted by morning_rain
Ok.
As I said earlier, I dont meant to offend you.
We can agree to disagree on this.
No there is no offence felt MR. But I fail to understand what is that we are disagreeing on? In my opinion, you asked me a question/view and I provided an answer - there is no disagreement.
Can we agree that there is no disagreement?????
Chandresh
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Chandresh
Advice is free – lessons I charge for!!
Posts: 1920
Location: British Columbia
Posted on: 27-01-06 17:38:25
Location: British Columbia
Posted on: 27-01-06 17:38:25
Quote:
Orginally posted by chandresh
No there is no offence felt MR. But I fail to understand what is that we are disagreeing on? In my opinion, you asked me a question/view and I provided an answer - there is no disagreement.
Can we agree that there is no disagreement?????
Chandresh
Well... We both disagree that there are scientific reasons a woman should be kept out of a kitchen or temple during her period. I find this to be a form of gender segregation and a patriarchal tradition that was originally meant to keep women \"in their place\". I have researched this and whatever reasons I have read dont seem'scientific' but ' subjective opinions' only.
thats my view.. so since I know you wont agree..we agree to disagree
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~ Morning rain
