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Orginally posted by BlueLobster

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Orginally posted by Anti_DESI


I know a few people on this site personally - people told me about it. If you’d bothered to read all the posts – a number of people have come out and said they know me personally on a few different occasions. I grew up in Canada. Obviously I know Canadians. Secondly, you just reinforced brat's initial point - taking single phrases out of context and picking at them. The message, as harshly worded as it is, in the original post was transparent. I don’t think you’re an idiot - so don't tell me that I wasn't being clear with use of language like "adverse to interracial marriage". And yes, people have been nitpicking at single points, twisting them out of context and forcing side-debates in order to divert the topic while ignorant the overall point of my posts.

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And if you could read, you'd know that I agreed multiple times with the "overall" point, right from my very first post.

And yes, if you can't phrase stuff properly, people will pick on points. I don't think you're an idiot either, so there's a chance you can make some constructive changes to your presentation. Take that "I'll show 'em immigrants" attitude somewhere else/

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Orginally posted by BlueLobster Take that "I'll show 'em immigrants" attitude somewhere else.

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Sorry, double posting - scroll back...

Lots of discussion and repetitive material on this post. The question, to me seems a bit hypothetical as I believe that it is not possible to impose your views on grown up kids. My concern would be more about the level of maturity kids have when they start dating as break up can have serious emotional consequences. Rather than intervening in kids’ relationship, it would be better to instill a sense of responsibility in them so that they can make right choice. Rather than ethnicity, my concern would be about the educational background, intelligence, nature, maturity and behavior of my kid’s date. I have my doubts whether any immigrant family who is in Canada for more than 5 years would have any serious objection to race etc. I do not see any discussion on aforesaid aspects and still this Anti Desi and his side kick accuse us of not having intelligence.

One more point. Anti desi somewhere stated that we should be grateful to his forefathers who fought hard to earn respect for us DESI. While I do appreciate and respect the struggle they made, I do not have to be grateful as my father and grand father also made HUGE sacrifice fighting for freedom. Our migration is purely for economic reasons and Canada also “invites” immigrant for its own interest. There are no obligations involved on either side.

<i> I have my doubts whether any immigrant family who is in Canada for more than 5 years would have any serious objection to race etc. I do not see any discussion on aforesaid aspects and still this Anti Desi and his side kick accuse us of not having intelligence. </i>

As his sidekick, I take offense to the idea that I said you lacked intelligence. I took issue with Ashish's writing and his bigoted remarks about gora, and that was about it.

Secondly, I'm sorry to have to report that there are at least some people who have been here a long time who take issue with interracial marriage. A family friend disowned his daughter after she got seriously involved with someone who was white (then the story spread that she was involved with drugs and ran away. Untrue - she was thrown out, but this was kept secret). I'm not sure how long they'd been in Canada, but I'm pretty sure his kids were born here and since his daughter was old enough to be dating, it had to be well over five years. It may not be the majority but it happens.

Then of course, there are the cases that appear in the news every so often of girls that were murdered by their families for not marrying who their families wanted them to. Again, not representative, but it happens, here in Canada, with families who have been here for longer than five years. I'm sure I can find you names and articles, if you'd like, but for now, I will leave it at that.

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Orginally posted by Anti_DESI

LOL! Hey, what ever happened to all that “Freedom of Speech” protected under the Charter of Rights stuff… yada, yada, yada.
What’s good for the goose is good for the gander, right?

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Are you there?

I think Brat made some important points here. The reality is that there can be terrible consequences to children whose parents can't accept inter racial relationships.

The cases can be quoted ad infinitum because there are so many!

Whether the issue is color, culture, class, people die or have their lives ruined because of a simple decision to not allow mixed relationships.

Usually the women suffer the most - the girl that brat referred to was called a prostitute by her father who spread the rumor that her white boyfriend was pimping her out. With parents like this who needs enemies!!! In fact, she had gone back to school during which time her white boyfriend supported her financially and she is now working as an RCMP officer.

Anti Desi, some of the people you're arguing so vehemently with on these side line issues agree with you! You'd be better off confronting those that don't.

BL and JB made some very intelligent and valid points - it would have been far more useful if you answered directly to those points. That would have cleared up your position.

Just a friendly suggestion, Anti Desi.

Speaking NOT as Anti Desi's sidekick, I'd like to say that the attitudes that he's referring to are reflected by comments like:

1. Why don't you speak Punjabi, Hindi, you're Indian?
2. Why don't you dress in traditional clothes?
3. Why don't you eat curry?
4. Why are you dating these Gori/Gora? You should find a nice Indian boy/girl and get married.

Well, some of us don't speak Punjabi, Hindi, because our parents didn't teach us, because they felt there was no point. Since we live in Canada, there hasn't been any need to speak it except when we try to integrate into our own community where we're rejected because we don't speak the language, and where people will deliberately not speak English (even though they can) and ensure that we feel insulted and further isolated.

We don't wear traditional clothes because we're not used to them, not comfortable in them, often don't know HOW to wear them (saris) and this climate is not the best place to wear that type of clothing except perhaps in the summer time.

We eat curry when we go to a place where the person actually knows how to cook it! We don't, and when we do it usually turns out gross. No, most of us will not eat green raw chilis because we're not used to them.

We date people based on the character, personality and common interests and don't recognise color, creed, religion, etc. And no we are not promiscuous and do not hop into bed with everyone we go out with.

We are Indians! We are Canadians! We accept the best of both worlds and reject the worst of both worlds. AND WE ARE DAMN PROUD OF BEING BOTH!!

We don't like the attitudes in our community which in effect isolate US from our community, and isolate our community from North American society.

Anti Desi, you should stop using the term "you people" because our community is our people and the reality is that they are isolating us and not the other way around.

When you use terminology like that you make it appear that you are isolating yourself which is not and has never been the case.

Children born in Canada who are "confused", (and Anti Desi isn't one of them) are confused by these attitudes. Indian girls I know were not allowed to go on "sleep overs", a Canadian tradition amongst young girls. Being invited to a "sleep over" means that you have been included in the group and is important. Rejecting an invitation is seen as snobby and rude.

It's a simple tradition, but this is one way that inclusion and exclusion is determined socially in Canada. The parents were always creating situations where the girls were excluded because they rejected these types of invitations. They also created situations where the girls believed that if they associated with white people they would be corrupted and their lives ruined!

This attitude is ludicrous at best and racist at worst, and in my opinion is unacceptable.

These same Indians are also the one's who will attack their own people most viciously when some white person comes up with some slander against some Indian because the white person is a racist. They believe and defend everything that person says for no other reason than they're white!

So, who, in reality are the Oreos!